Thus I Wrote

You're never alone, if you've something to share

A New Beginning of Sorts

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At 61 I chose to live on the top floor of a big house on the top of a hill with a view of Alexandra Palace and the Sky. There was no lift and three flights of stairs from the street to the top floor.

I could walk to my partner’s flat down the hill to the left and to Crouch End village down the hill to the right, both within 10 mins.

Following my illness I had gambled on my health being good for at least 10 years into the future. I had chosen to position myself ready for the next challenge. I had chosen to reinvent myself. The future was uncertain with only the ultimate end clear. My recent past was turbulent.

I chose a base that did not require too much work. However, while it had much that was new, there was still much to do. It took more time and effort than I had anticipated. It would take a while before I would feel safe. Before I would consider it home.

Written by thus.i.wrote

February 29, 2020 at 7:58 pm

Posted in Prose

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Non Serviam

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“Nobody gives it to ya,
Ya gotta take it”
That’s the ‘law’
That’s how you make it

And they took too much
With cruelty and the gun
Then with inheritance
And with organisation

I had no monopoly
Or old money to fire
I’d only innovation
And a work ethic for hire

Written by thus.i.wrote

October 15, 2019 at 11:11 pm

Posted in Philosophy, Poems, Poetry

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I know it’s in the distance
Where the earth meets the sky
Sometimes I glimpse it
In the corner of my eye

And so I distract myself
With everyday things
With learning & entertainment 
With words and with strings

Still, inexorably I’m pulled 
Into the wilderness
To the twisted shapes moving
I see the twilight confess

And yet on the journey
When I hold your hand
Something somehow changes
I feel a meaning I understand

Written by thus.i.wrote

September 24, 2019 at 4:15 pm

Posted in Poems, Poetry

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Remember to Breathe

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Life is unknowable
Like a Zen Garden grows
Life is unknowable
It comes, and it goes
The Way’s much more
Than the End achieves
I know the Cherry Blossom
It flowers, and then leaves

I must remember
I must remember to breathe.
I must remember
I must remember to breathe
To avoid those, who will deceive
To work on, what I believe
To give more, than I receive
And remember, remember to breathe

Written by thus.i.wrote

September 21, 2019 at 12:50 pm

Posted in Philosophy, Poems, Poetry

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I’d Nearly Died

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I was slowing down
I slept at wrong times
I forgot many things
I forgot my lines
And then I awoke
With you by my side
And a blinking blue light
…I’d nearly died

I remember being wet
They cut my pants off
I faded in and out
Many hours were lost
In my head was something
It was growing inside
My behaviour changed
…I’d nearly died

From friends and family
A love I didn’t expect
I ordered my affairs
For what might come next
I was glad to wake up
I shivered on the slide
I’d bled too much
…I’d nearly died

Then came steroids
Not much sleep at all
But very dark dreams
I passed out in a fall
The hospital staff
Helped as I tried
As I recovered slowly
…I’d nearly died

Too much to say
Too intense and raw
Over days and months
I struggled with it all
But you were there 
You held me when I cried
As you struggled to cope
Cos I’d nearly died

Written by thus.i.wrote

September 21, 2019 at 11:48 am

Posted in Poems, Poetry

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We are not Alone

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Lo There do I see my Father

I don’t like it much
The destruction, the division and the deceit
But does that make me
One of the Liberal Elite?

I don’t like it much
All the insults & the lack of respect
But does that make me
Too Politically Correct?

I don’t like it much
The noise all around
All the ignorance and the lies
But empty vessels make most sound

There’s never enough time under the sun
We all leave this place with much undone
With visceral feelings of roads not taken
But we’re not alone and we’re not forsaken

Lo, There do I see my Father
Lo, There do I see my Mother
And My Sisters and my Brothers
Lo, There do I see the line
Of my people back in time
Lo, They do they call to me
To take my place in the halls of Eternity
Where our enemies have been vanquished
Where the brave shall live forever
Where the truth shall reign
Where there’s beauty and no pain
Where we shall not mourn but rejoice
For we have lived a good life.

I’ve squandered my days with plans of many things
And I did not plan for this, but now I vow to live it well
For all that I ought to have thought, and have not thought;
For all that I ought to have said, and have not said;
For all that I ought to have done, and have not done;
I ask for forgiveness.

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 20, 2017 at 3:12 pm

Empty Vessel

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Riding With Death B&W

You chose him
You’re responsible
He’s a symptom of your disease
You’re not anymore
Some shining city on a hill
You fill the world with unease
You’re now losing
All the wonder
You had found
Empty vessels make most sound

He ain’t patriotic
He don’t pay taxes
He insults war hero McCain
He sows division
Making many incisions
With insulting tweets again
He makes fake news
Cos he don’t want
Your feet on the ground
Empty vessels make most sound

He destroys
& He divides
Cos he can’t create
He lies
& He insults
Cos he’s threatened by what’s great
He pollutes
& He poisons
All that he’s around
Empty vessels make most sound

Written by thus.i.wrote

October 11, 2017 at 9:46 am