Thus I Wrote

You're never alone, if you've something to share

Posts Tagged ‘Love

The Lady in the Cloak

leave a comment »

red-riding-hood

We were weighing, the goods
When she fell there in, the woods
I think she misunderstood me, that last time we spoke
She took fright and, she ran
She’d no idea, or plan
But she felt more safe there, alone in her cloak

Did she see something, in me?
That she didn’t want, to see?
Or did she think all my feelings for her, were just smoke?
I wasn’t ready for, the ride
It knocked all my confidence, inside
When I felt her moving from me, the lady in the cloak

The emotions, we keep
They may be shallow, or deep
That’s why I needed to look at her, when she spoke
I knew her so well, I believed
But I think that I was, deceived
I’ve still much to learn about, the lady in the cloak

These days, I’m so open
Many soft words, I’ve spoken
They say I’m such an emotionally, intelligent bloke
But it’s such a balancing, act
Between honesty, and tact
And I forgot about it all, with the lady in the cloak

It’s a human, instinct
To self protect, I think
We use barriers to protect us, from other folk
And I kept, mine down
To save her from, falling down
But she couldn’t hold on, the lady in the cloak

I said I was never, addicted
But I couldn’t have, predicted
How those words would come, back to choke
Because now that, she’s gone
My world it feels, all wrong
Cos, I’m missing her, the lady in the cloak

I wait there, in the woods
I met her ghost, weighing the goods
I asked her to fix, what I hoped wasn’t too broke
Even though we’d lost, each other
I still hoped we’d find, each other
Cos, I still wanted her, the lady in the cloak

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 13, 2016 at 7:43 pm

Move On

leave a comment »

butterfly

She’s a grand woman
I remember her smile
I remember her fun
All the chats o’er the miles
We connected so deep
Even though for a short while
Then she was wonderful
Then she made me smile

There’s no time for regrets
Even though my heart is sore
I’ve grieved some
I’m sure I’ll grieve some more
Sure there’s a hole in my life
Where once she was there
She grew word by word
Until I really cared

We tried, it was fun
It was a hell of a ride
We travelled way too briefly
Together, side by side
I thought there’s more in it
I thought there’s more to come
But we couldn’t hold on
And now it’s all done

I won’t forget her
But she won’t hold me back
I’ll keep the rope tight
Now’s no time for slack
I’ve still got more energy
I’m not lost or stuck
I’ve loads more to give
With effort and luck

The sun always rises
After the dark of night
Nothing good comes
Without some kind of fight
I’m ready for tomorrow
But I’ll enjoy today’s sun
I’ll grieve as I need
But then I’ll move on

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 12, 2016 at 9:20 pm

Barriers

leave a comment »

bergman-cooper-saratoga_opt

We hide behind barriers
To protect ourselves from harm.
Sometimes I wonder if we act
Too quickly to the first alarm
Grace under pressure
I find it so hard to do
Did I act too rashly
I really tried to enjoy you

Another broke down today
Why now, not years ago?
She hid behind a wall of anger
What was behind I did not know
Did that wall serve her well
Or isolate her from the world and me
Only she will know if it served her
Well or ineffectively

I find that barriers often cause,
More barriers to be raised
Or we lower and raise them,
Out of sync instead of phased
We advance and then retreat,
Hurt with every misread signal-bruise
Alone, of course we’re free
But alone we often lose

In the end we’re together
Because we can’t bear to be apart
If we can’t break down barriers
Then we can’t connect our hearts
Maybe we’re not attracted enough
Maybe the chemistry isn’t there
In the end to make it work
We need to really care

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 12, 2016 at 9:15 am

The Healing had Begun

leave a comment »

diego-rivera-yellow-bw

You caught me as I was falling
Out of the mist there rose the sun
As I climbed back on high
I felt the healing had begun

I began to mend the cracks
Yesterday darkness might’ve won
But today I was strong enough
Now the healing had begun

You have so much love to give
You had little time to give me some
I wish I could’ve given you more
Now the healing has begun

In the past you were chosen
This time I was the one
You filled me up with love
Until the healing had begun

Your smile I will remember
Your love and your fun
I’ll always remember the dream
And how the healing had begun

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 11, 2016 at 10:45 pm

Kiss and Make Up

leave a comment »

diego-sitting-woman-bw

My stomach churns again, as I stare at my empty phone
It mutely fills me up, with the emptiness of being alone
My tears fall now, and it seems that it’s getting worse
I’m really feeling it now, but this ain’t my first
I’m sick with wanting you, and all that we vowed
I’m sick with the loss of you, but I’m still unbowed.

I love my memories of you, but all that’s now past
Time moves so quickly, it’s a shame that nothing lasts
I don’t know what you’re feeling, is it anything like this too?
Cos surely I meant something, as deep as this to you?
Don’t you want to meet, and we’ll draw a new line?
Can we not kiss and make up,  together one more time?

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 11, 2016 at 7:31 pm

Broken Hearted Again

leave a comment »

10-diego-rivera-retrato-de-natasha-gelman-1030x787bw

I ain’t afraid to say it
I’m broken hearted again
And if you read this
Know that it ain’t your sin
I guess we tried
But trying don’t always win
I’ve learnt another lesson
Broken hearted again

I really thought we’d found
That which we all seek
A love that’s so strong
A love so pure and deep
But we fell off the horse
Just after we were to begin
Now we’re hurt and sore
Broken hearted again

We wrote and we spoke
Many times a day
But now there’s too much silence
So many things in the way
So many barriers raised
Is this what reality brings?
It’s an old familiar feeling
Broken hearted again

Will you curl into a ball?
Into a foetal position?
Protect yourself from harm?
With controlled decisions?
You said we are twins
We feel everything the same
Do we still have a chance?
Broken hearted again

I regret some things
But only how we played
We moved so fast and free
Should’ve used some scripts instead
Oh.. I loved the feeling
And the deep connection we gained
We’re brave but we lost our grip
Broken hearted again

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 11, 2016 at 12:10 am

Black Dog

leave a comment »

High Fidelity B&W

I thought this wouldn’t rhyme
Cos what I say ain’t so pretty
I try to be open and honest
And accept the truth about me
I’ve had good times in my life
And I’ve had my share of luck
I remember your honesty last night
You called me a lost, stuck, fuck

From the open dopamine dream
To the wary cool reality
From all the perfect imaginings
To the differences we could see
And the ghosts of your past
Strewn, growling, around me
To push me away from you
From what I wanted it to be

Was your gaze just too strong?
Or too much wariness in you?
Were you just too controlled?
Or no passion for me in you?
My head gave wise counsel
I listened to my heart more
To the contract we wrote online
And our horse so nearly born

I tried time and time again
But I wasn’t keeping score
Who owned these barriers?
I did not know anymore
Did I even know what I was doing?
Was I trying to fix what was wrong?
Was something broken and disconnected?
Did Brexit and your art just not belong?

Is that a black dog growling?
Some dark guardian over you?
In the still, grey, wet, Winter’s day?
With dead leaves stuck like glue?
The water leaked from the vase
Of flowers that I gave you
My champagne lay unopened
Forgotten and unloved too

This now requires some reset
To go right back near the start
We found we know each other
Painfully, only in some parts
We don’t love each other yet
But we could still be the one
I grieve for that lost dream
And for all that’s suddenly gone

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 8, 2016 at 9:33 pm

Dopamine Dream

with 2 comments

pips-concert-bw-3-crop

I left you smiling
In your sleep
It was the end of a night so surreal
We never touched
We never kissed
But you said you would dream of me

You suddenly reached
You suddenly connected
Somewhere deep in the heart of me
My butterflies flew
My heart beat faster
Then it was only you I could see

Earlier I questioned
And you never once flinched
You answered so honest and true
I felt so strange
Like I had touched the sides
Somewhere deep inside of you

This was a dream
Some dopamine dream
Where endorphins rise and rush
I felt your serenity
Over thousands of miles
Your connection made my face blush

You rose to meet me
To somehow fit me
To articulate so confident and true
The power of your words
The beauty of your words
Fills me with butterflies anew

Now this is living
Now this is playing
This is life so far from the shelf
Our beautiful friendship
Is such a wonder
That I never dreamt it for myself

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 6, 2016 at 10:06 am

Fabulous Women

with 2 comments

love speaks like silence

I’ve met them, those fabulous women, working on their quest

All beautiful, all wonderful and dressed to look their best

We’re all such good people and gentle in this context

But we move on disappointed, resignedly to the next

They look at me carefully and I watch them sift and weigh
They measure everything, every movement and word I say
Their body language speaks and quietly it tells me all
They lean back but often times, it’s I not they who falls

I see the masks and barriers, that they hold up before
As I pull them down, somewhat roughly, and I ask to, please, see more
Why am I so impatient, so quick to find their core?
Most are happy on the ocean, I’m so hungry for the shore

They need to feel safe, and trust takes time, that’s clear
Brick by brick we build trust, to replace barriers and fear
Trust is calm predictability and it’s not chaotic change
There’s a responsibility to open, to teach and to arrange

I find that barriers often cause, more barriers to be raised
Or we lower and raise them, out of sync instead of phased
We advance and then retreat, hurt with every misread signal-bruise
This relationship between us, is always both of ours to lose

Authenticity is what we seek, and that better version of ourselves
We can bravely play in the jungle, or observe from barren shelves
Of course, sometimes we’ll get hurt, and sometimes we will fall
But better to have tried and failed, than never to have ventured at all

Written by thus.i.wrote

November 28, 2016 at 10:57 am

Rhythm

leave a comment »

frida-khalo-flowers-bw

I’ve always had vinyl thoughts
In a world digital and online
And as all the world connected
I’ve often felt different and offline

My heart won’t move too fast
It moves to a beat that’s slow
It’s wary of too much emotion
It won’t trust what it doesn’t know

I looked across the table
I saw her laughing at my jokes
I sometimes wonder what happened
How did it all go up in smoke?

Maybe it was the wine that night
It was red and it was rough
But we just drank it all down
We never knew enough was enough

Oh..she was so beautiful
Something about her just won’t let go
But she had too many masks
Now I guess I’ll never know

I’ve tried to feel the rhythm
To understand how it all moved
But I’m still blind to the rhythm
As my every mistake proved

Written by thus.i.wrote

November 24, 2016 at 2:40 pm