Thus I Wrote

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Posts Tagged ‘Relationships

Uneasy

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tunstall-kt

When you parted from me
I felt uneasy
Incomprehensibly
I felt uneasy

We’d connected tentatively
Then more deeply
All too briefly
More deeply

We rode wildly,
We fell differently
You and me
Differently

Have you taken from me?
All you needed from me?
Unquestionably
All you needed from me?

What do you think when you see?
Your memories?
Playing timelessly?
In your memories?

We’re moving on freely,
Moving on differently
You and me
Differently

Since you parted from me,
I’ve felt uneasy
Instinctively
I’ve felt uneasy

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Written by thus.i.wrote

January 15, 2017 at 12:12 pm

No Words Left

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sad-germania-bw

I’ve no words left
After how we parted
I’m alone at sea
Trust’s now re-started

What now of my needs?
What now of yours?
The contract’s broken
Back knocking on doors

“Lovely, lovely memories”
Yes…you’re so right
They shine so bright
In this cold turkey night

Of course it’s my shit
I know it’s mine to manage
In this cold empty silence
I will limit the damage

We lived wild for a time
We trusted each other
In a brief oasis of time
We enjoyed each other

Written by thus.i.wrote

January 12, 2017 at 5:29 pm

Things Fade

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berlin-dome-dove-2

Alexanderplatz in the snow
Berlin Cathedral on show
Grey sky, Blue stars appear

Near Frankfurter Tor
Something began to stir
We drank beers and examined our years

I lost myself…I lost myself

We give so much
Now what’s left of us?
As we fit in and survive we said

Later we stared at that dome
And talked of our homes
And how our past pulls and things fade

I lost myself…I lost myself

Written by thus.i.wrote

January 11, 2017 at 12:26 pm

Two Candles in Berlin

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two-candles-in-berlin-2-bw

I lit two candles for Lana,
There, in snowy Berlin,
My prayers mingled with the smoke,
That rose in the quiet space therein.

I get impatient,
Trying to connect true,
When games get in the way,
Of what is beautiful in you.
I wanted you to be real,
I don’t like false layers,
But I know I asked too much,
So my patience was my prayer.

Lana, I think you’re unhappy
You know how to survive,
How to protect yourself,
And to economically thrive.
But love is much misunderstood,
Have you ever known real love?
One that nurtures and grows,
Signified by that dove?
You were an intelligent, sensitive child,
Lost in a big boisterous family,
In a rough, striving environment,
Who listened to you intently?
Did you grow too hard a shell?
To protect yourself in there?
I wonder at your loneliness
So your happiness was my prayer.

Ruthless

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ruthless-1-bw

I’m not that ruthless
I’m not as decisive as you
I worried that if I jumped
Your fall could hurt you
And I was trying to take stock
I was trying to understand
I was trying to hold on
Trying to hold your hand
I was trying to stay on
As we were thrown about
I was honest, I could’ve lied
In my confusion and my doubt

I’m not that cool
I’ll say I’ve been hurt by you
I’ll say I miss you
I’ll say I want to see you
There were too many questions
I could feel you slipping
Then we were falling
We could hear things ripping
I gave all I could
I really cared about you
But I knew this could end
With only hurt to hold on to

I ‘m not that confident
I can’t say it will be fine
No, I need to see much further
Right on down the line
I don’t close my eyes and jump
No, I look before I leap
And maybe he who hesitates is lost
But we gotta choose what we sow and reap
This is another defeat
But we have not lost
Let’s remember the dream
Let’s forget the cost

Written by thus.i.wrote

January 8, 2017 at 4:07 pm

In Berlin

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brandenberg-gate-bw

There was snow on the ground
Blue sky and sun all around
Was that the reason my blood was so thin?
I drank from the cup
Before I tried to get up
Why did I feel so exhausted there in Berlin?

They smoked outside in the snow
Then into cool music they go
They could hide cos the light was so dim
They kissed and caressed
She moaned and she pressed
There was a decadence there in Berlin

They gave, it seemed a lot
Fruit’s always juicy before the rot
I finished the song Ruthless to sing
The buildings big and clear
It was all a bit functional and austere
I’d a lot of mixed feelings there in Berlin

Beneath the cathedral dome
In high renaissance like Rome
The organ could let God hear us sing
Outside in the snow
Past blue stars I go
I found some peace and beauty there in Berlin

I dreamt of Lana del Rey
How I became her prey
Her vulnerability hid her desire to win
But though I know about love
Signified by that dove
I shivered with the cold there in Berlin

I lit two candles to show
That love can grow
And that closed games are such a sin
I offered up two prayers
A symbol of how much I care
Such warmth was needed there in Berlin

Written by thus.i.wrote

January 8, 2017 at 3:47 pm

It’s All Over Now

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frida-khalo-flowers-bw

You must go now, you must protect yourself
You can see a better future for you from the shelf
In your head, you had a dream of me
But I was nervous competing with someone I couldn’t see
“Don’t worry, we need no scripts”, you said, now didn’t you?
Ah, but it’s all over now between me and you

This pain is real and I ain’t made it up
I didn’t drink for a long time, but you held the cup
I never felt anything, quite like this before
When we met I was nervous, about what I wasn’t really sure
You held back, I tried to push on through
Ah, but it’s all over now between me and you

I wear my heart on my sleeve now, or so I’m told
I want it all, or nothing at all, it’s time to be bold
You seemed to get me, you said that we were twins
We gave and wanted love and to be the best at everything
We talked of plans and starting our lives anew
Ah, but it’s all over now between me and you

I forgot the lessons that you tried to teach me
You want loyalty and you want love, unconditionally
I know now you’ve set the bar way too high
And you ran when you saw that I would not comply
I would’ve liked one more chance to make our dream true
Ah, but it’s all over now between me and you

I remember all the messages that you sent to me
All those pictures and words seared in my memory
But now we’ve fallen, into a dark silent abyss
Was our deep connection so easy to dismiss?
But are all such questions now just wasted on you?
Ah, cos it’s all over now between me and you

 

Written by thus.i.wrote

December 26, 2016 at 10:56 am